North of Lillehammer and into the rain

We have been moving steadily northwards since landing in Norway on Monday afternoon. After my last report in when we spent the night in Aarlborg, we have taken a huge ferry across the Baltic from Denmark to Norway, leaving from Hirtshals and going to Kristiansand.

This was seriously impressive boat, even bigger than the one we took from the UK to Denmark the previous day accommodating about 600 vehicles and their occupants on 5 Car decks. The trip takes about 3 hours and they do their very best throughout to part you from your cash with duty free shops, three restaurants, bars for the non-drivers and a casino on board.

We had lunch in the main restaurant, a Norwegian smorgasbord of epic proportions. Arrival in Kristiansand was uneventful and motorbikes were off first. A big win.

So from there, to Larvik via a magnificent and scenic inland road, we soon realised that this is a spectacularly beautiful country and a few other things about it as well.

·      Norway has no water shortage. Everywhere you look there is a lake with someone’s weekend cottage on it. This is why you never meet Norwegians in other parts of the world when you travel. They stay at home for their holidays at their lake cottages.

·      Norwegian drivers really do travel at the slowest speeds in the world. The general speed limit is 50 kmh. Outside built up areas this is 80 kmh and on the very rare highway 110 kmh. More impressive or annoying is the fact that they all stick to it religiously.

·      You would be hard pressed to realise that this is the wealthiest country in Europe and there are some big lessons to be learnt from the way they live. They are frugal to the extreme and all the wealth generated from their oil and huge tax revenues, including a VAT of 25%, is invested in a long-term fund for a “rainy day” and in their infrastructure.

·      All their electricity is generated by Hydro Electric and wind sources and given the abundance of water and wind this is easy to understand. They have therefore pegged their most expensive daily costs in a world of diminishing energy resources.

·      The water here is spectacularly good and clean. Drinking the water out of the tap is better than anywhere else in the world.

·      Blond is the name of the game. Most people are blond, tall and strong. A very fit looking population.

·      Everything is massively expensive. We were warned but it still comes as a shock. A beer and a Coke are about $20 each.

·      The hotel bathrooms are the smallest in the world, even smaller than those in Fowey, Cornwall where we had a bathroom which we thought set the record. Here the shower is based on the straight jacket principle and in a land of over abundant water, they do everything to make sure you use next to nothing!

·      The cow shit Norwegians spray on their pastures smells as bad as the stuff the Danes use. This is one thing that they do not seem to be frugal about using.

So apart from the smell of cow shit everywhere the “two up” trip is going very well. Very interesting this threesome, as DB and I are learning the ropes and in particular how to simultaneously deal with a demanding third party.

Previous followers of my trans USA and Alaska blog will remember that riding a motorbike well is like making love with a highly strung woman and Jane is up there with the twitchiest. She needs full time attention and constant hands on soothing. So imagine yourself in bed with two women. One hot and ready to go, and your DB behind you. Both in the same bed, at the same time. The trick being to coax the very best out of the young filly in front of you, whilst keeping the older brood mare feeling safe and content behind you.

I am very focused on this task and any movement by DB behind me results in an instant adjustment in my handling of Jane. This is keeping me on my toes and is pretty tiring as well. Two up is more than double the workload of just one at a time!

So our routing has been as follows:

Larvik.

The hotel’s name gave everything away.

The Quality Inn Larvik Forsalls.

On arriving I soon realised that Forsalls is a local business Group, obviously with a history. The reason that it was a Quality Inn would have been that Forsalls, in a moment when their business was pumping cash, had decided that owning a Larvik landmark was a good idea. They would have soon realised that running an hotel was not their forte and this is when the Hotel Management Piranha’s smell blood in the water.

Like all of these level of hotel management groups, Quality Inn have given it a quick coat of paint and nothing much else. The rooms were tiny and stinking hot. All designed to keep heat in and the cold out. We needed the opposite and our window only opened about 10 cms at the top.

So, on a summers evening in a latitude where the sun never sets, we had to leave what little we could open and let the light stream in with an occasional whiff of fresh cooler air.

Even the Pommies took strain overnight and complained about no sleep!

Lillehammer

Home of the 1994 Winter Olympics. This would have been its heyday. Nothing much else has changed since then but it is very pretty and after booking dinner at the chain restaurant attached to the hotel we took a stroll and had a few beers. That is me, and not DB. In fact having DB with me is proving to be a schedule altering issue. On the Alaska trip, being alone I could follow my own program and generally this involved getting my blog updated and then dinner.

DB wants to see the places we are in. The good thing is that generally these are more beautiful and interesting than Rapid City SD or Astoria OR. So we walked around Lillehammer and tried to get a decent coffee. This is proving to be impossible in Norway because their frugalness means that they are still drinking instant coffee with chicory in it. I think their Minister of Finance was trained by BMW purchasing!

So we arrived back at the hotel at 19h30 ravenous and went for dinner. to save even more money the waiters do not take your order, rather you go to the counter to pay and order at the same time. Our waiter proudly told me that they had recently introduced this “innovative new system”. I did not have the heart to tell him that the Brits had been doing this for years in every pub!

So off I went to order where I was told that there was a one and a half hour delay for cooked food as the “Grill had fallen in”. Incredulous I asked fro the manager to be informed again that the grill really had “fallen in”. Further investigation uncovered the fact that this is the literal translation from the Norwegian for “broken down”. So off we went for the alternative, a choice that turned out to be superb in an old converted brewery cellar.

Then to bed, with DB demanding her turn for my attentions, so no time for blogging.

Trondheim

Today has been another epic motorcycle day. Up north and then a cut eastwards across the Frisvejen from Ringebu to Alvdal. The Frisvejen is a moor like area at very high altitude. Quite spectacular, with virtually no human presence. Then on north up to Trondheim. The total trip about 340 km. The only issue being the rain clouds which eventually stopped threatening and delivered, slowing us down as the roads are narrow and I was very aware of my two bedmates and the necessity to keep them upright.

Trondheim is the third largest city in Norway and was founded in 997 by Viking King Olav. It is very beautiful and once again we are in a choice hotel, at least this time in a great location. Most notable is the bathroom which once again sets new records for size. At least here I will be able to sit straight on the toilet, but will have to wedge my legs under the basin and rest my head on it all at the same time. The toilet paper is once again the mandatory Norwegian Single Ply stuff. God forbid that anything is luxurious.

This evening I will finish the blog, post it and then DB and I will walk and have dinner at around 19h00. As always happens with these tours the group is starting to split into smaller dinner parties and we have found a very interesting and nice rider, David Murphy, who based in Cambridge where he runs the Cambridge Arts Theatre. He is married to a South African born lady and is a very good travelling companion. There are also three other couples and then two further guys, Nick and Phil who have been mates since junior school and biking together for nearly 50 years. A bit like my biking mate fondly known in our house as the “other Mrs. Friedman – Harold Bloch himself”. Clearly completely comfortable in each other’s company and good trip companions as a result.

So after I sign off it is washing. Travelling light so it is a shirt, socks and underpants only to hit the basin and a shower and shave before heading off for a walk and dinner. Seafood to be sure here.

Tomorrow we continue north to Mo I Rana, from where we launch our bid for the Arctic Circle the following day. This route takes us inland and is not the most picturesque as we save the coast and the fjords for the return from the Arctic Circle next week.

So from Trondheim, Good night and Good Luck.