Ola.

So it is November 2017, and I am about to set off on a motorbike trip again. This time with a new riding mate, nephew Simon, El Toro, Huxter. Bull of the South American roads. We will be undertaking one of my most sought after trips.

From Puerto Varas in the Chilean lake district, all the way South, to Ushuaia and then Punto Arenas, at the most southern tip of South America. Having been to the very north of Alaska this will be a good way for me to finish off the America’s.

In the intervening years my bike hareem has undergone a full revamp, with a new set of long legged beauties in my stable. The original Spot and Lesley have gone, put out to an honourable retirement, traded in on newer girls, but all versions of the original ladies. They always say the second wife is a clone of the first, just a bit younger and tighter. The latest bikes in my garages (UK and SA) are both BMW R1200 GSA’s with all the goodies. This is the same bike as Bonnie and Spot, just newer. But different from Jayne who was a thoroughbred long distance tar road traveller. I now feel the need to get down and a bit dirtier with my girls. More trips like this one, for which Jayne is just not cut out.

My older riding partners, “Scope” and “Panto” are also not along for this trip, being totally disorganised. Also MVLP has cried off and two other invitees did not arrive at the airport. So definitely no “naughty naughty” on this ride! My mount on this ride is an unknown blind date supplied by the organisers. I only know her pedigree which is true blue BMW and will be introduced to her for the first this afternoon. Maybe it’s better this way. If you are going to have a bit of Nookie, then at least when you are finished with her, it’s goodbye and no expectation of calls, sms’s or WhatsApps. You use her. Ride her hard, no remorse if you are a bit rough and when it’s all said and done, apart from paying for any damages, you are free to walk away. Not even a glance over your shoulder.

After a few attempts to get a motorbike trip to Patagonia together, the great day arrived on Tuesday 21/11.

My first attempt was in 2013 and the organisers could not get sufficient participants and cancelled the trip. We were offered any alternative in their portfolio. I went for the Norway trip and was accompanied by DB who has now told me she will read this blog and that she really does not like this name. So, from here on forward she will be referred to as MVLP (Most Valuable and Loved Person). MVLP is holding down the fort in the UK and baby sitting Mini VLP (Valuable and Loved Person).

Anyhow getting back to the case in point, the Norway trip resulted in our meeting the famous Panto, who has become a firm friend and riding partner. He has to work this year and cannot make the trip to South America. My other regular riding partner, Granny Harry aka Dr. Scope, is also too busy working to get away.

I am fortunate to be accompanied by nephew Simon (El Toro), who has just had to visit Dr.D of the long putter infamy.

My trip to Santiago has been somewhat roundabout via London and our home in the UK to collect some riding kit. On Tuesday evening my flight left Heathrow late, scheduled that way @ 22h00 for an epic 15h30 minute nonstop flight to Santiago. This is BA’s longest scheduled flight and is operated by the newest aircraft in their fleet. The Boeing 787 and my first experience of this aircraft. I spoilt myself and flew FC which was fantastic, really comfortable and great service. An interesting fact about this aircraft is that its pressurization system makes for a lower cabin altitude than any other commercial passenger aircraft currently flying. This means that as a passenger you are subjected to less time at a high cabin altitude which in turn means theoretical less stress and less tired arrivals. Based on this one off first experience I can confirm that it works, as I travelled epically well and felt great on arrival.

A quick dodge through customs inspection via x ray due to heavy load of “tong” to keep hunger at bay on the trip and prunes to keep stomach freed up. Distracted the operator as the bags transited!

Nothing much had changed in Santiago since my last trip here on business in about 1990. Airport is the same. Chaos then at check in for domestic departures now still chaos. Security checks still madness and ineffective. No clear signs to the domestic departure, which is on a different floor.

Eventually I am through all of this and out of nowhere this big hand grabs my bags and hauls them off the security conveyor belt – El Toro – whose arrival in my South American life could not be more welcome. Physically I was at the point of collapse from carrying my essential kit, packed in two bags. For trips like this, trips in which one is not starting off on your own girl, it is critical that you carry everything you need for the trip with you, in case the luggage goes walkabout, always a possibility in South America. The negative is that it all weighs a ton, but having it with you means you can do the trip albeit a bit short on clothes etc.

We struggle to the Private Lounge courtesy of our Card Key (Standard Bank Private Bank) membership and a bit of a welcome respite from the outside madness. The various lounges I have access to are always a godsend. An hour there and we are on the way to Puerto Montt, about 01h30 south in the Chilean Lake district.

Flying South the view out of my window is spectacular. Volcano peaks dotted everywhere, a reminder that this is a geologically unstable country which sits directly on the San Andreas fault line. It keeps on getting more and more beautiful outside.

Puerto Montt airport is also madness. It seems as if the whole of Chile has decided to fly on the same day. Tourism is clearly booming, based simply on the number of tour operators meeting people. From what I can read the economy is on a tear. This begs the question as to why South Africa has the only economy in the world that is in recession other than Zimbabwe and Venezuela. No prizes that it has something to do with leadership or lack thereof!

From Puerto Montt we have a small bus to Puerto Varas which is on Lago Llanquihue, adventure activity centre of Patagonia. Somewhat like a ski village on the lake. Magnificent scenery here with a huge lake and Volcano on the one side, also snow topped.

Check it all out on El Toro’s Instagram account, to which we will be posting rather than trying to incorporate the shots in my blog. The address on Instagram is: Instagram.com/Simon_is_travelling and myself at Instagram.Com/Friedman2111

Also I need to let you adoring sports fans know that I will not be posting everyday as in the past. It takes longer than you realise and we have a great group of people so dinners will be long and I have decided that after arrival in the afternoon a short nap will be the way forward. So every so often I will post and update things, but not fanatically so.

Last night El Toro and I went out for a quiet steak at an excellent restaurant recommended by the hotel and close enough to walk. After an excellent Bife de Chorizo (Sirloin) and Salade de Palmito (Palm heart salad with Avocado) we were back and in bed by 2145 with lights out, for me by 23h00. The internet in my room is awful so no real newspaper reading or other activities, which now need an internet porn site for stimulation.

Today up at 06h30. The coffee machine in my room makes prison style coffee so down at 07h30 for a light breakfast and then into town for a good strong South American shot! Then back to the hotel and starting to get all our intercom’s and other kit organised. There is a group briefing at 15h30 and the girls start arriving at 16h30, which is when I will be introduced to my new “Darling”. Hopefully she will be in great shape with not too many miles showing or having had too much heavy riding. I have paid a bit extra for what I want so I should be pleasantly surprised.

Reading my earlier blogs I mentioned that I prefer to operate on an empty stomach. I find this definitely makes me sharper. The only reason I mention this is that I seem to be very hungry at the moment. I am surprised as generally being on this Ketogenic diet controls my hunger very efficiently and I only eat one real meal each day, this being in the evening with a day long fast to push my ketone level up. The side effect is that I stink like a mine worker after an eight hour shift. When MLVP tells me that I stink, I am very happy. So last night I see people recoiling from me as if they are shot – so I do not have to measure my ketone levels! But my hunger meter is completely out of sync and I am starving at lunch time. It maybe the cold as it is very chilly (sorry about the pun) here.

The Hotel Cumbras on the shore of the lake is as good as it gets on a motorbike trip and the tour leader seems top class. The rest of the group also seem to be excellent with a high percentage of ladies, something that makes for excellent dynamics on a tour. I understand that there are ten bikes which is a great number. So this evening after the briefing we will be out for dinner, at the same place we were at last night, which is fine by me. Then tomorrow a 240 mile trip to Bariloche in Argentina. This is in the mountains and will also be cold, but beautiful scenery. One border crossing.

So until the next time, good luck, good night and goodbye.

Adios